There, I said it.
Why did I lose 2 matches and only win 1? Why was I not particularly competitive in either of those losses? Why did I fall so short of my goals and expectations?
Well, because I made too many mistakes and missed too many balls.
And that, folks, is ALWAYS the reason I lose. Plain and simple. Laid out for the world to see.
I can beat myself up for weeks, even months, about why I played that bad. I have a laundry list of excuses.
* I was distracted running the online brackets - True, but I fancy myself a bit stronger mentally than that
* The music and atmosphere of the place were bothering me - Also true. But I have been doing this a long time and if stuff like that is going to bother me then I should probably stick to online bracket management.
* I had a minor cue malfunction (my bumper fell off in the middle of a match) - Again, true. This actually bothered me quite a bit and I never really recovered.* My lucky UTEP socks completely failed me - Don't even get me started on those sons of bitches
The point is that all of these things compounded together sabotaged my Saturday in a way I just didn't see coming.
But they are just excuses. Nothing more. Excuses are an ongoing reason to fail, and I refuse to do that.
In the weeks leading up to the tournament I trained as well as I ever have, sparred with some great players who all assured me I was playing good and I played really well in league matches.
None of that mattered. And sometimes that's the case. Sometimes you do everything you know how to do and when the time comes to deliver, your mind and spirit are off somewhere else doing something else.
And it sucks.
So, what next?
I could quit pool forever and forget I ever took up this infernal game.
Alas, I'm not a quitter.
More training, more sparring, more hard practice and an evaluation of what to do about not letting all these external factors compound against me is what is in order.
And I'll do that.
And I'll be back.
Believe it.
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